Are you a Christian? How often do you pray to the Lord? How were the answers? Were they good as your requests or dislike your wishes? What is the most answer that you have gotten from the Lord?
I want to ask these questions because for me to know magical things that God answered someone always attractive my attention. They actually will encourage me to keep praying to the Lord and to grow up in my faith. In the same way, I usually tell someone who is struggling with something about what God have done in my life in the same situation to encourage them. So if you are the people who have low self-esteem, who feel unbeloved, the story is for you.
I was born in a big family with parents and five siblings. I am the second girl of my parents. My sister who is older than me and more intelligent than me was a person that I always was compared with. I was a low self-esteem and anxiety person. I often heard from someone around me that I was so ugly girl with a lot of freckle on my face and I was a quite girl. I felt alone and was not be loved or accepted. “Why am I so different with my siblings and why can’t I do anything as well as my older sister?” I prayed that God changes me become a new person with a nice skin and nice characters, and so everyone will love me, accept me. But after praying I still felt shame, anxiety and could not look at the person who I was talking with because these negative thinking were still in my mind either they were thinking like that or not. So at that time, to standing in front of the class or a group of people especially strangers I would not do anything as well or even speak as well. I couldn’t do anything that I wanted to do because I thought what would happen if I fail. So my prayer didn’t work.
When I go to the college, I have learned that God should be my director, my driver instead of me myself. And He would guide me, help me to overcome these negative thinking,… He is the one who loves me without any reasons, requires. He even accepted me as His dear daughter. He made me feel that I am a princess in His eyes. I am unique. I realized that I have to give Him all of my sadness, my disappointments, my fears and do whatever I want without thinking about how others look at me or will they love me or accept me? God love me that enough for me and so I live for him not for me only. I prayed and gave Him all. I didn’t know how God did it but I already forgot what others would think about me. I love myself. I accept myself and be content with who I am. My life changed at that moment.
I became a speaker of my class. I was even a leader of a big student group and I did so many things that I never ever think I would do it before. I remembered I already sang a song in front of my classmates and my professor in the competition and I got the highest award. How wonderful God is when He helped me to remove the negative thinking. My friends who were my classmate in the high school couldn’t recognize me when I went back home during the vacation.
My dear, God also love you and ready to help you overcome your fears, your weaknesses. Just go to Him and pour out your heart to Him. I do believe that how He did to me, He will also do it to you and even more.
Keep praying by your knees and your heart. You may see many magical things in your life.